7 in the morning. The most dreadful morning I have ever had. Waking up to screams and urgent footsteps were not the kind of alarm clock that I was anticipating for. It was just the third day of my vacation in Manila and things have completely turned upside down. The trip to Baler was cancelled, Enchanted Kingdom get-away was set aside (which was moved to a later day), and get-together with friends was postponed. And yet, I would not want to be anywhere else, but beside my poppa in the ICU.
That one person whom I know is health conscious, vice-free, and active was betrayed by his own heart. We all can never forget how my poppa described what he was feeling at that time- "It felt like my heart was penetrated by a knife. Every time I move, it digs deeper." At that time, I cannot not question as to why things were happening. Of all the people, why him?
My sister and I were inside the emergency room when doctors and nurses gave the first aid to my poppa who was as white as a snow and sweating like a pig. He was agonizing in pain and what it seem like "last" words kept coming out of his mouth. Two morphine shots were already given one after another and yet, his suffering kept getting worse and horrific. It was a nightmare I will never ever forget.
After ECG, the doctors found out it was a heart attack. They immediately gave us two options. The most crucial decision I have ever made in my entire life is when we were asked by the doctor, "Idadaan po ba natin sa gamot or angioplasty na?" I can just imagine the fright and anxiety in our faces as we were running out of time and we know the ONLY and BEST answer was option 2. Questions came in after we have decided: "Kaya ba natin? Saan tayo kukuha ng pambayad?" I could only think of one thing at that moment; that is for my poppa to get better or the pain will be brushed away, at least. Everything was on edge.
An hour or so have passed, the doctors and nurses finally came out of the CathLab's operating room. They have found three blockages in my poppa's heart through angiogram and they have placed a stent in his right artery, where the biggest blood clot is, to widen and completely strengthen the damaged veins. The other two was not touched since the body could not take another surgery. The cardiologist, Doctor Melissa Co-Sia, explained and elaborated the situation; in which at that time, all was blur to me. My mind kept rejecting what she was saying. If we did not put action to everything, we could have lost him. It was just an hour left according to Doc Melissa. Our other doctor, Dr. Cayetano, also explained that even if he has a healthy lifestyle, we can never fight against hereditary illnesses. So, there it is. It is in our blood line and we cannot do anything about it. Whether we like it or not, men in our family will get the same heart disease.
All through out our stay in the hospital, I felt the weight of the situation on my shoulder. This is something my parents never let us experience when we were young. Major problems and situations, yes; but, passing on everything to us is another thing. I thought I was already strong enough during those hard times in the previous years; not until these 6 days in the hospital that I have grown to realize what COURAGE, NEVER GIVING UP, FAITH, and SACRIFICE truly mean and feel.
Is everything back to normal after the operation? I am afraid not; yet, we are all still hopeful that things will be better now. At least, for the meantime. I would like to extend my gratitude to my poppa's bestfriends, my TeamFab loves, Tita Cathy and Tito Moy, insurance officers, staff and doctors of Metropoplitan Medical Center, and of course my one and only for not only taking good care of my poppa, but also embracing me and my sister through out the dark times. Maraming maraming salamat po.
If there is one thing I have learned with what happened, that is to treasue every second you are with your parents for they are not getting any younger anymore. LOVE THEM. I felt terrible and guilty to be away right now and God knows how bad I want to come home for good. I have been questioning for months why am I in Singapore. What's the purpose? All the uncertainties are now lucid. I have to stay here and finish what I have started not just for me, but for my family, too.
When we were scared, loving arms surrounded us. When we came short-handed for our expenses, generous friends gave out a helping hand. When we were losing hope, courage has stricken us. All rushed in at the right time. God, You are truly majestic and amazing.
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