The Good and The Bad

"I don't regret the painful times;

I bare my scars as if they were medals.

I know that freedom has a high price,

as high as that of slavery;

the only difference is that

you pay with pleasure and a smile,

even when that smile is dimmed by tears."

- The Zahir, Paulo Coelho

Splotchy face...

Hurting eyes from too much crying...

Brain is about to explode from all the thoughts running through my mind...

Oh wow.

Life, you just hit me again right on the same spot for the nth time.

Bull's eye!

When good things are coming,

something/someone will always try to spoil everything.

Oh wait, it just did.

Just when I thought life is getting better,

something would pop out of nowhere and it will ruin everything.

Did I let it destroy the good things coming?

Heck no.

Lesson learned:

Never ever let anyone make you feel

unhappy- with or without your consent.

It's just so wrong. It feels awful.

And so it goes...

The good old drama-rama of my life.

The ups and downs of a typical person.

What's new? :/

Only this time, I think I'm making the same mistake again.

The same mistake I made 4 years ago-

committing in a relationship

and not confident enough if I am 100% sure of how I feel.

And it sucks. BIGTIME.

I don't want to hurt anyone because I know the feeling

and it's not nice. Trust me.

What to do?

Gah.

Sometimes, I wish I would hit my head and

forget about everything.

Can I just eradicate all the hurtful things in life?

Or...

Can I just walk away and say "fuck you?"

Damn it.

This is driving me insane.

God help me. Please. :'(